Rayguns consciences and boxer shorts
by Blue-with-purple-polka-dots
Summary: Yeah... just read it okay. ZAGF Gaz and Zim Friendship... then again maybe not depends on how you look at it heh. Not a romance. One shot. Onetwo instances of swearing.


Disclaimer: Invader Zim doesn't belong to me…. Unfortunatly.

Yeah. I know. I have another I.Z fic in the works not to mention a monsters inc one (it needs a lot of work too I might add, the last chapter totally bombed).

Plus I have work to do rather than write silly one shots. Oh well.

I decided to write this fic. A ZAGF if you will... well almost. Not a ZAGR okay?

Maybe another time for such things eh? I do have a fondness for that underdog of a pairing. Gaz is 12, and Dib is 13. Zim is… well I'm not really sure. Heh.

Before you ask (after you read) ZADR is okay. I just can't really take it seriously. For real slash I'd say look at RAPR (though again before you ask my other fic is not that.)

--

The familiar grooves of the portable game embedded into her fingers as she continued to play, her slightly bloodshot eyes twitching upon the screen.

Pausing it, she took a gulp from the soda bottle on the desk beside her, trying not to gag at the warm, flat taste, staring around her bedroom for a few moments.

This game had been surprisingly difficult, even for a time worn gamer such as herself. It was such a challenge, that even now as the digital clock at her desk indicated the time being 3.21AM she was still playing.

Whenever she started something, she always had to finish it. That's just the way she was.

The red numbers of her alarm clock seemed to irritate her for some unknown reason. She quickly turned its glare away from her view and resumed playing once more, her elbows resting upon the hard wood surface of the table.

She was almost there… just two more levels and she'd beat the game.

Absentmindedly she blew a stray purple lock of hair from her face.

Just a little longer and maybe she'd go to bed… as long as no doomed individual disturbed her of course.

She rubbed her tired eyes and continued playing, lost in her own world of vampire piggies…

"FOOLISH EARTH-MONKEY! YOU DARE TO CHALLENGE ZIM?!"

Even though the exclamation of these words usually didn't phase Gaz, in her lethargic state the pure level of noise at usually such a quiet time didn't only make her _jump_ in shock but also in her horror- drop her Gameslave2!

_GAME OVER…._ The electronic device said in a flat voice as it lay on the floor.

She gritted her teeth.

Of course her brother _had _to have decided to bring his pathetic fight with that alien loser back home with him.

She curled her small hands into a fist as she looked out of the window to see the pair in question. Their figures clearly visible in the street light's glow.

It appeared that they (as was usual) had given up any dignified way of fighting and were now wrestling each other like children.

_Well we are children…_ a vague inner voice said. Causing her to sigh in further irritation.

She opened her window forcefully.

"DI-IB!" she growled loudly to them "If you guys don't keep it down I will DOOM you!"

The boys seemed to ignore her. Lost in _their _own world of stupidity.

In actual fact they grew even _louder_ with their immature name calling ringing through the streets. It was a wonder that none of the neighbours were up complaining.

Of course _normal_ people were usually dead to the world at this time of night. And lets face it, these three kids were hardly classed as normal by the surrounding neighbourhood.

Gaz gave a disgusted snort as she watched the pair tumble around, in almost questionable positions.

Perhaps she'd take a picture, and post copies around the school. Perhaps that would stop them fighting.

Chuckling evilly at first she quickly lost interest in the idea. There were so many girls in their middle school who would think it was adorable rather than embarrassing.

She could inadvertently turn both her brother and his arch-nemesis into babe magnets. Vivid mental images of the pair being chased by a hoard of girl rallied through her mind.

She repressed an involuntary shudder at the though and continued to watch them.

Her brother's hair was in a tangled messy affair, his features shadowed in the dim flickering light.

"Give me that _gun_ Zim!" he yelled out loud, the sweat running down his face.

Gaz noticed for the first time the large weapon enclosed in the alien's hands. It was almost akin to that of the old space B movies It was yellow and red, and twisted into an almost spiral egg shape.

It glinted in the light as Zim continually tried to regain control of his weapon.

Zim who was pinned beneath him simply shouted out.

"YOU WILL NEVER PRY THE…" then amazingly he stopped "You know what?" he said becoming bored "I'm just going to shoot you anyway." He wretched the other side of the gun from his human enemy's grip and grinned a zipper toothed smile.

The young teenager's eyes widened beneath his glasses as the gun warmed up.

He seemed frozen almost, despite knowing he could duck out of the way, seeing as _he_ wasn't the one pinned down.

Then he did something unexpected.

He grabbed at the 'gun' once more and pushed the blue ray which emanated downwards.

Instead it hit Zim's left leg, rather than Dib's head.

Aghast the green alien let out a hideous scream as a strange greenish liquid rushed out of a clean cut wound on his upper thigh.

Instinctively Dib grabbed at the gun… and ran down the street, disappearing into the darkness.

Apart from the odd retch, Gaz did not hear anything else from her brother. He'd just ran from the hideous scene that lay behind him.

Gaz shook her head. Considering the amount of times he claimed he'd do Zim's autopsy himself, he appeared to have a low tolerance for gore.

Having been mildly entertained by the events initially she looked uneasily towards Zim below.

The green (blood?) was still continually draining from his leg.

It stained the pavement as the small invader curled himself into a small ball and gave an inaudible sob.

That surprised Gaz, why wasn't he screaming out in pain as usual?

It must really be painful if he was acting like this….

She bit her lip as she watched him turnover on his back and wheeze, the pain obvious, red light shining out through his fake lenses.

His wig detached itself from his head as he continued to sweat, the perspiration being enough to slide it off.

All the while wheezing like a goldfish taken out of the water. Like some pathetic little goldfish…

She looked at him for several moments, when an irritating little voice, one she thought she'd killed years ago whispered to her.

_For Fuck's sake just go down to him!_

It was official. Her conscience was still a bitch.

Besides he'd stain the pavement, and probably stink up the place if she didn't do something. She rationalised to herself as she hurried down the stairs and through the front door.

"Gaz-human?" she heard him thickly wheeze before he passed out.

She sighed as she picked up her smaller extraterrestrial counterpart.

_No-one had better see this_ she thought as she made her way down the pavement. She had an image to maintain after all.

--

The light strained into the room.

His eyes twitched in irritation as he held loosely onto the small blanket.

Then for reasons completely unknown to anyone (let alone he himself). Zim found himself on a hard cool surface.

He blinked in amazement.

"Wh-what?" he stammered.

This phenomenon was new to him. Irkens didn't tend to _sleep_…

What had happened last night?

He looked around him, and concluded he was in his bases' living room. For whatever reason, he'd been occupying the sofa, which he'd just fallen off.

Hard.

He glanced in confusion at his left leg and gave a small shriek.

His trousers were gone, he was dressed in boxers and his leg was completely covered in _bandages_.

It was a rather crude arrangement of what looked like human medical fabric he decided. He put a hand to his head.

When had he removed his wig?

Or his lenses?

"MASTER IS AWAKEY!" he heard a familiar shriek as a small hyperactive robot threw himself on top of him.

"OW! GIR!" he yelled at him "Get off me!" he shoved the SIR unit to the side "How did I get here? What happened? Where is Dib-stink?"

"Do you want WAFFLES?" the robot asked blatantly ignoring whatever he said.

Zim gave an exasperated sigh. "No GIR I do not want WAFFLES. I want to know HOW I GOT HOME!"

The house almost seemed to tremble at the decibels reached by the alien.

"Gazzy took you home!" he replied cheerily, dancing around him in a circle around the seething Irken. The robot gave a small sigh as he repeated the name "Gazzy human."

"Hmm?" the alien said in confusion.

"She stitched-ed and wrappeded you up real gooooddd…" he said happily. "I'm going to get me some TACOS!!" he shrieked as he entered into the kitchen, leaving a very confused master behind as he contemplated on the past night events.

So the Gaz human had helped him? That was interesting. He believed her to be the type who would help no-one. Yet she had helped the almighty and powerful ZIM! Impressive for a dirt-monkey.

He rubbed his hands together an evil smile spreading across his face. Perhaps with her he'd finally be able to get rid of Dib-stink.

Dragging his left leg along with him he entered into the kitchen he noticed the note lying on the table.

Perhaps a letter of her wish to help in world conquest and rid the world of her brother?

He edged over eagerly and picked it up.

There is green spiky ink were clearly the words:

_Interrupt my game again and I will DOOM you._

_Cheerfully,_

_Gaz._


End file.
